Discussing Assisted Living with Your Parents

By: Adult Care Advisors | No Comments August 8, 2013

Although it would be ideal for seniors to live at home all their lives, it is not always the safest or most practical option. Staying alone at home all day can be quite dangerous – particularly when the individual in question is facing increased fatigue, reduced agility and more frequent memory lapses. Moving your senior parents from a familiar, warm and loving home to an assisted living community is not easy – for you and for them. Adult Care Advisors provides insights on how to convince senior loved ones to move into assisted living facilities.

Tread carefully so the discussion doesn’t turn sour before your senior parent has had the chance to hear you out. This calls for a little planning:

Understand the ‘why’: You can’t spring this idea on your parents without knowing why it is necessary. Think about it and come up with why this is the best solution to the current problem. For instance, your aging father will be safer in a community than home alone all day, or your widowed and lonely mother will make new friends at the assisted living community, and so on.
Understand the ‘when’: Don’t wait for your parent to suffer a serious injury before you consider senior care. See the signs and time your discussion early. Unusual depression, lack of enthusiasm, weight loss and unkemptness are some symptoms that show the need for assisted living. It’s better to plant the thought earlier than force your loved one in to senior care after a visit to the emergency room.
The conversation: This is always a difficult topic to discuss because it brings to the surface a range of emotions from fear and anxiety to rejection, guilt and helplessness. It is important that you are prepared and have done as much work as possible prior to this conversation. Make sure they know it is a discussion, and that you value their opinion and feelings in the matter. This is a conversation that calls for input from both parties. Hear your parents out – they will also have some valid points that need to be talked about.
Suggest a tour: A guided tour across a few assisted living communities might make the idea more real to a parent; be sure to narrow the list of communities down to just a few. Very often, the sight of other seniors living happily in a community without the hassle of daily tasks will spark some interest in them. Focus on certain factors like good safety and security measures, fun social activities or the increased privacy for those who need it.
Take time: Don’t rush the process. Give your loved one time to adjust to the idea of moving out. It’s a confusing and stressful period and you must emphasize the fact that you will provide unwavering support.

Our professional consultants are available to advise you how to approach your senior parents and discuss assisted living options. Contact Adult Care Advisors and talk to our experts in New Jersey.